The detective saw his opportunity. He grabbed the waitress’s arm and said,
“Rachel I need to talk to you. My name is Detective Everett Green and you don’t know me but I’m deeply in love with you. I know this all sounds strange, but your ex-husband hired me to find dirt on you in order to discredit your good name. The reason is because the small track of land you two still co-own in West Texas is actually sitting on a deep reserve of oil. He knows this, and has been looking for a way to discredit you in court so that he can keep the land and all of the money for himself.
But there’s a way we can beat him, I’ve looked into the inheritance laws and we can make a compelling case in court that the land should actually go to you since you initially received it from your father when he passed away. Your scumbag-ex Rich won’t have a leg to stand on. Then we can sell the oil rights to the field and sail around the world. Maybe after we’ll settle down in Colorado and start a family, I know how much you love the mountains.
But I’m getting ahead of myself. I know this sounds really weird but it’s been my job to follow you the past six months and over this time I have learned we’re soul mates. I too love dancing around the kitchen while cooking, enjoy action movies and have two older brothers. You’re deathly afraid of spiders, are left handed but paint with your right and you can’t help hearing a Billy Joel song without singing along. When I see you smile it’s like…”
But before he could finish his sentence Rachel leaned in to kiss him.
“Have a nice day sir, here’s the check,” said Rachel the waitress, who gave him a quick smile and walked away snapping Everett out of his day dream and back to the job at hand. “Shit,” he sighed to himself, “if not for the child that might actually work…”